2010-03-28

Horses and Heartache

The boy was frustrated that the pony was not turning when he asked.  He was having trouble balancing at the trot and struggling for the rhythm, so his slight signal to the horse was quite hard for him to make.  The pony however, was rather green and just doing her best too!  She simply couldn't tell the difference between his wobble tug and his real intended turn please tug on the rein and she didn't respond the way he wanted.  Yank yank yank he acted out.  She was so mad at the student she made him halt and dismount immediately.   And as she steamed she told him to just walk the pony around the outside of the arena.   This was so she could calm down and figure out what to do to him for yanking the pony's mouth 1,2,3 times like that. As they walked, she realized he was on the verge of tears and halting and dismounting and then having a chat about it was probably a good enough action step.
*
Jill was babysitting an 8 yr old neighbour and they up in the kid's loft bed reading a book before sleep time.  The careers for girls book, which made a Very valid point, about a drawback to horse careers.  It said you'd have to be able to withstand the heartache.  Ellie asked Jill what that meant, so Jill told her a recent experience.  Her eyes  welled up as she said that little paint pony she'd been working with was going back to her mennoite home.   She's just not what the stable boss is looking for.   Jill said that pony was one of the sweetest, smartest gals she'd ever met and that she doesn't have a mean bone in her body.  Jill was mad at herself for letting the other instructor bully her out of the pony as a project, but she left that part out...  She told her kid friend  about the pony's intense fear of tree branches and how she hoped it was not indicative of her environment or experience before she came to the farm,  and how she hoped the pony would be treated kindly and fairly wherever she ended up. "She is such a high-pitched frequent vocalizer.  You should have her the way she neighed."
*
Jill had always wanted to have kids, had already long longed for a family.  Her best friend was never having kids, and her sister was becoming a famous feminist who thought anyone who aspired to parenting had fallen for false ideals through society's evil brainwashing.  Like shopaholics and obsessed consumerists or something.  Jill felt bad for her urge.  She knew the world was overpopulated, and she wanted to leave no environmental footprint on the earth, to make the world no worse for wear for her existence, and yet still she wished.  

2010-03-25

A Catch

Jill's last boss one said he thought most of the guys that worked there, did so, so as to hang around with her.  She had worn polyester space clothes as a cashier at an adventure game in the evenings after being a horse camp counsellor by day, before her first year of university.

Her new lesson buddy was debating about taking on a new contract, because she felt the client had a romantic interest in her. She was afraid it was conflict of interest to take his money, when she didn't feel romantically about him.  Meanwhile, she ALSO wanted to work for a guy that she had a crush on, ha.

They saddled up to this chatter and set out the arena right on time.

*
"If I was in charge of this operation," Jill said to her beautiful sidekick,  "he would be wearing his helmet, he would be working the horse in a fenced corner and we would be laying ground poles for the other barriers.  Horses are very barrier oriented and it would help."

It was entertaining to see the expert manage the sprited young horse.  It was a beautiful first day of spring!  The very tall man had a very hard time keeping the tiny bay gelding going round properly.  He would either rush on and buck or stop, quickly turn in and turn the other way.

"Good!"  Jill shouted to the man, many years her senior and far more credentialed than she, every time he insisted on sending the horse FORWARD the same way around the circle, instead of allowing the horse to turn in, or stop.  As if it was her business!

The horse was quite adept at his evasion and his owner was quite adept at addressing it.  And, when forced to go the way he didn't want to go, he would gallop, then stop, on and on.  What a naughty boy!  "Good!"  Jill would encourage the lunger, who was very strong, and consistent in the right way, anything a little slow in his movements he made up with stregnth.  Quite a pleasure to watch lunge, all in all.

And then, the next thing you knew... the horse was loose and running free and fast.  Jill had closed the the main gate behind them but not latched it.  There was a red gate between the big field he was in and the even bigger field next door, and that's where they were standing.  Jill ran to the other metal gate, pulling the red one behind her saying "close the gate" and closing the human sized gap the horse was gunning for.  Ho! HO! HO. She was waving her arms at him and leapt up on the gate as he screeched to a halt going deep with his forelegs into the mud.  Jills feet moving up the fence actually had connected with is flesh in passing. Unbelievable. A true brush with death.

"You should have seen the hoofprints in the mud where he stopped.  It was a miracle he stopped.  It was a miracle he didn't flip into the metal gate even after stopping."

And, in then in three simple steps Jill caught hold of his lunge line, and stood at his head and he stood, with thundering heaving sides.  They were ALL out of breath.

The lunger came over saying "many horses kill themselves when they find themselves dragging something like that, so,,,er,  jolly good.  But, I'm not going to let him get away with it." and went right back to where they had left off.

Wonderful!

Flying With Eli

Jill always said that the ONE day in Ocala that she actually caved to peer pressure and rode without her helmet to be cool, was the ONE day she actually fell off. 

"I was supposed to be walking only, with the unspookable boss of the boss's event horse. He'd been on stall rest and we'd built a rapport during all the laser treatments and handwalking, so I knew he'd be safe."




He was also a measley 15.3, and after the giants Jill had been riding for the very tall boss, she felt fine about wearing sunglasses out on a hack instead of her hat. Members of the High Performance Committee had shown up that day, and she wanted to make good impressions.

She had been grateful for the chance to turn Buddy around to face the tractor in front of them. The boss had bestowed this honour, "I know how much you like working with him on the ground."

They made fun of her around there, for working with Buddy, with her helment on. But he was dangerous, and powerful, and intentionally kicked OUT at you. He had also run her over, knocked her to the ground and dragged her towards the barn. Wearing some safety gear was the least she could do to protect herself was the way Jill looked at it. She didn't have medical benefits but she wasn't refusing to work with the animal! Wearing the helmet certainly increased her confidence and gave Buddy's ESP the correct message that she was not giving up...

Anyway, that day, during the exhilerating/relaxing and unusually helmet-free hack, she went flying. That is, after about 30 calm and relaxing walk minutes in the Florida sun, Elvis took a couple of tiny trot steps and leapt with all his might, up and then forward. An eternity later, as his front feet were about to hit the ground, and Jill was pitched a little forward in her saddle, he added a tremendous buck. What an athlete!

Jill could see the ground coming a long time before she felt it. "I almost stayed on" she said, after hitting the dirt and making eye contact with her still mounted trail buddy, as Elvis backed up in a scramble, dragging her through the grass by the rein still clenched in her right fist. Jill was amazed to be conscious and she didn't have the wind knocked out of her!

Robin said, "I saw. Now LET GO" firmly and calmly. Despite the fact nobody wanted that particular horse on the loose, a working student/employee getting pulled around was not healthy either. She would say later, in a terrified voice, "it was amazing. All four feet were off the ground at the same time. For a long time!" and rhyming off the daily allowable/aka recommended advil doses.

Jill could laugh about it, because the saving grace was that he caught her totally off guard. "That's why I wasn't hurt at all. I was totally not expecting it and totally relaxed! But thank goodness I didn’t land on my head. I am going to learn from the flying lesson with Elvis and never go out without my helmet ever again! You never know when you will go flying through the air!"

She would remain in Ontario the next winter and write three helmet promoting features for three different Horse Magazines. And, Jill would be comforted to eventually learn that the last 5 working students before her had been dragged by Buddy and refused to have anything to do with him afterwards. While she became known as the Nervous Nellie for dealing with him with her helmet on!

2010-03-24

Horse Prose?

Jill knew that more than one person had been stealing her ideas by reading her blogs for years.  But she didn't mind.  She felt like her creativity was like goodwill, not a limited resource...  Besides, no one was ever gonna pull off her notions in the same way she could.  There was always gonna be room for her, and she would make room for them too.


*
The woman in the barn could relate to Jill's frustration in the job market and told her story.  She said that she used to supervise teams of people with their MBA in the banking industry.  She had made it over the glass ceiling, and worked in a management level that was only 20% women, and she was the youngest person in such a role!


When she got out of banking and hit the street, she was busted for not having a university degree.  To her surprise and horror...  Her corporate experience did not translate well in the job market without that piece of paper, and in the time that she was figuring it out, she became obsolete in banking.


If I am going to go back to school to get some credentials it is going to be for something that I really want to learn about!  The woman was signing up for clinics and riding lessons and coaching certification tests, instead of re-certifiying as a Financial Planner and re-liscencing as a Mutual Fund Rep.  Yeehaw!

2010-03-23

Spin Doctor

Jill's friend was just getting started in her program at the OVC.  She showed up for coffee and started talking before she even sat down.  "I've been thinking about those medival times show horses and the fact that the small ring and the same movements night after night after night is bad for their hocks...   SO WHAT?   Is staring at the same daily office computer screen not burning out the eyes of many a human cog? is the repeated typing motion not causing HUMAN carpal tunnel syndrome?  For god's sake, they're not glue!  And they are not being shipped inhumanely to the meat market.  When i was there, they seemed to LIKE their work. And, i refuse to look down my nose at a horse having a job to earn his keep."


Jill had no idea where the tirade was coming from but she always enjoyed her friend's passion.  In fact, she shared it!
*
When it was Jill's turn to reveal what she'd been up to she whispered shyly how she  loved touching the harnesses at one place she worked.  It was just moving them about to sweep the corners really, but they were lovely.  There was even one with a red leather underside, ooooooh la la.


She also told the story of making a speech to a woman she would like as another one of her new bosses:
"But if you'd done something stoopid with a horse and got hurt and you're the expert on horse handling your cast looks bad. If you were doing everything properly-as-an-expert-should and got hurt by a horse that would look even worse! So, personally, I think its PERFECT that you got hurt tripping in a tire track that had NOTHING to do with any horses..."



Jill admitted feeling discouraged and disheartened "Will there ever be a permanent, suitable position open somewhere that I will want, can apply for and get?

2010-03-18

Blue, and More of the Animal Family

Jill was glad her marks in school were good. And, her horseness was good too.  Her lovelife however was a mess. She didn't like being persued by so many guys at once, it made her feel creepy instead of popular.  Meanwhile the guy she was hoping to spend more time getting to know was always on the phone or in a meeting or in Florida or otherwise somehow far away.  The truth was she didn't even know yet if he was "available"!
*
Jill had always had to admit that her little sister was always a good little rider.  She wished she'd kept it up so they could spend more time together.

"Remember when that little green pony named blue ran back to the barn with her?"  Jill's ole friend was reminiscing.  To the bystanders that weren't there at the time Jill elaborated "He ran and ran and she tried valiantly the whole entire time to halt or at least slow him and didn't manage it.  Though she was successful in staying on top of the unstoppable little guy!  I can't remember what he even spooked at but he bolted on a hack all the way home and right into the barn and right into his stall... who was in the barn then? For crying out loud, there she was on his back right inside.  Hilarious eh?"


*

"He's quite an independent horse."  the owner's surprise surprised Jill so she went on.  "I've never known one so actually calmly interested in each adventure around him." They were all agreed how hound-like in his interest in scent was.   And, Jill had already been pointing out his unusual willingness to drink from strange water sources.  He never seemed to get tired!  She thought he would make the text book endurance horse.  And, that he needed a pet!  The way he looked forward to the corner of the hayfield where the neighbour's dog had jumped the fence at him, that time, reminded her of how he looked for the cat at the barn!  No kidding.
*
Jill saw the dogs running and barking at them a good distance away but they were coming fast.  one chocolate lab and one gold?  surely they were used to horses?  a split second later she realized there was a fence and thought it was time to release the heart up in her throat.

You weren't supposed to run from a dog.  you were supposed to stand your ground and stare it down, turning always to face it.  it was like she told the cats, the dog can't chase you if you don't run!  she'd never had much luck with that idea on horseback though, and fortunately had met only friendly, controllable dogs or one that her horse could indeed outrun (against Jill's instruction).

Then, as the dogs reached the barrier, and slowed down, one stopped and the big one jumped and cleared it.  The compact chesnut horse tood at Jill's command.  She was impressed.  He was spooked yes, but he remained obedient and seemed curious!  And then, the dog stopped too.

And Jill didn't know what to do next.

Blink blink, they all just stared at each other.

Till Jill had the invention to r u n at the dog. And gave the horse the aids to move forward, to trot on.
AND THE HORSE DID IT!  Straight toward the canine.  And, the dog turned and ran off.


*

"My new theory about how he gets urine on the lid of and walls of the litter box is that he half lays down in the litter box to pee.  That's how he gets urine on the lid of the boxprobably because of the way he had to recover from surgery by dragging himself across the kitchen floor like a kill deer of the back end, as he improved enough to finally move himself away from his water dish!" yikes.  he would probably be the type of pet that would thrive in a bungalow, whereas the other one loved to race up and down the stairs..."  Jill loved to stand around in the barn sharing every minute detail of each pet's movements, with people who seemed sincerely interested, ha.  But, she wished the barn didn't smell so much like cat pee...ha.

2010-03-16

Kiss Me I'm Irish!

Top of the morning, he'd texted.  Happy St. Paddy's!  After she replied he wanted to know where and when, ha.


Out on their date she got the run down from her able/hot bodied funny flirtasious farrier friend on each of the 11 horses in her care the year she'd worked morning chores for his family.

"Who was the young one when I was there?"  Jill was shocked that she couldn't remember herself. There had only been the one filly that year, a sweet little thing she had nuzzled and kissed on the muzzle Monday-Friday for an entire year, teaching her to pick up her feet and cross tie and lead proper, without making her a pet, of course.  He instantly remembered the sweet little bay of that season's moniker, and touched her heart just saying the foal's name!   Smartie was a  3 yr old now and coming along nicely.

"What about witchi-poo?"  He said she'd wrecked a pastern so bad she'd been put down.  "Wish I'd been there."  Jill joked but also!  that mare was  m e a n.  Any of the animals that intimidated her enough that she didn't enter the stall with the clean, refilled water bucket was a thorn in Jill's side, ha.  She liked to consider herself competent as a trainer, let alone groom.

And, recalling on down the barn they went.  What a nice evening!

With many a good story about riding in Ireland thrown in there. ha.

It was nice to hold hands on the walk home and she was surprised how much she liked the way his hands felt.  It would be nice to hang out more with someone who really liked horsies, and spent so much time around them.  She remembered her work days at his family's standardbred farm.  Almost every day of the whole summer she would find herself standing in a pile of muck or pushing a tippy wheelbarrow back and forth in the dust and dirt to look around joyously in love with her job.  big blue sky.  big green fields.  the wind in your hair. and all the horses you could ask for...



*
He mistook the fact that she was funny, for the fact that she was happy. Jill's students overheard her explaining why the date the night before was another disappointment somehow, and they were spreading the news between them. The fact that they'd met at yoga had everyone with high hopes.

On the upside, the private yoga classes in the beautiful studio were well worth the time Jill spent earning them. And, she always secretly agreed with people when they suggested out of the blue that she'd be a great yoga teacher, and she always aspired as she sang and scrubbed. Being optimistic felt good.

She liked to get the horse to do weird things with her. Like walk into the tack room so she could get her gloves, or go straight through the arena door without her dismounting or even out the barn through the vet clinic. Of course it was against the rules and she would never do it in front of a student but c'mon, haven't you heard of the ponies smuggled up in condo elevators for birthday parties? Jill was obviously deeply effected by the "Ballad of the Irish Horse" documentary she often borrowed from the library. In that film a guy takes his stallion by boat the mares on the island in the season and a lady rides out of her kitchen and down the stairs of the porch on a pony!




2010-03-11

Happy Valentine's!

While concentrating with a big long lunge whip in one hand and the lazy leg ignoring chestnut rascal (who will run from a whip or buck if he doesn't want the rider to use a crop) clipped to a long lead called a lunge line held in the other hand, Jill corrected what a dad had piped up and said to his son:

"Actually do not grip with your knees, just let your legs hang there with gravity and let your body learn to go with the motion." Suddenly the student, holding the crop like a straight bar in front of him, with his reins in knot on the pony's neck in front of him, lost his look of terror and really suddenly got the trot rhythm balance and started having fun with it.


He made his teacher and dad laugh by doing this kooky barbell rhythm with his arms all up and down like a disco dancer, canoe rower out on the town or something. He was grinning from ear to ear and the devil pony thankfully, trotted on like a goooood boy... whoo hoo, what fun.

Wisk, who would NOT be caught for the barbell boy, was good for the next student and also seemed fine on the lunge for one of his regular girls later. She brought Jill a box of valentine's truffles. Ain't that sweet?

2010-03-10

All In A Name

The friggin' horse was actually rearing.

One steam boat, two steam boat...THOSE TWO FEET BELONG ON THE GROUND, horse. Jill was kicking him forward, the next thing you know she was making sure to keep her weight forward, hands round his neck so he didn't go over backwards. It seemed like quite a straight up rear to her. It also seemed like everything on the whole farm went quiet and frozen while time stopped, while plodding on and on and on as he was upright like that!

Til then, he'd been bucking and lunging and backing up THREATENING to rear and she'd been insistent, calm and patient. While pushing as much as the owner encouraged. The horse taking their communication to this new dangerous level was actually making her mad. No doubt better than afraid, ha.

When he came down, she pushed on but he went backward, then bucked. She was doing her best to sit back and pull the head up but then soften in time that he didn't rear again. She did not think of herself as a slouch but this was pound for pound more pony than she'd bargained on!

It was some kind of spring fever! And a four year old's first time to the road with all its scary traffic sounds and it was also the very first minutes of her first time on his back? He'd only been ridden a handful of times, by the man who raised the foal, a giant tall thundering fearless huntsman and vet. "Me thinks we started a little too assertively our their unanimous best interest," Jill would make light of it later.

She was not a fan of dismounting in strife and usually subscribed to the ride it out philosophy. She had found herself in many crackerjack situations she should not have been in before but believed in justing "riding out" of them! But this particular combination of disruptions, with absolutely no sign of abating, had her make a snap decision.

In the exact second after the brat took several constructive steps forward toward the forest and towards home she said "I'm dismounting on a good note. I will lead him forwards for now. Forwards is the key here right." and she leapt to the soggy ground, probably to the annoyance of his owner. He liked the animal's spirit!

She was glad to have her helmet on, even to lead the beast. ha. What a naughty brat he was to the day's light load. He deserved the workout he got from the owner around the usual fields after that, ha.
*
jill was reading an old email in a thread from a friend. it seemed so long ago she had said "i love stoney poney. remember how i was too busy to decorate his stall door so the kids did it for me? i always love the barn kids too. i really need to get myself a horse. i oughta look in jerome and put a car on my financial goals list."

2010-03-06

Full Disclosure

"I need to know where exactly your riding him." uhoh. Jill was in trouble. She had taken the horse on every square inch of the property, except over the cross country jumps as other hoofprints in the snow had done.

He kept pulling shoes! Really twistedly mutated shoes! yikes. Jill had to admit she was used to riding horses with barefeet. Hadn't they mentioned snowpads - did they help? Surely the snow would all be gone soon and she could get properly conditioning on the property with the owner's blessing and permission!
*
While gaining respect for his work as an artist, she was losing respect for him as a person. Full disclosure means telling your friend you're thinking of travelling or taking a new job, before you actually do... as opportunity allows of course. That kind of thing. What he had done was avoided mentioning his plans even after he had made them, and while they were together discussing nearly related events! He also said he was spending the weekend on renovations when in fact it was his art he devoted effort to. She didn't mind that, but she wanted friends who actively told the truth - to themselves and others.

Furthermore, Jill thought that it was ridiculous to use the argument that the person pictured doesn’t find their own actions offensive as proof that the action/image isn’t offensive. Yikes. But, the way he used his model’s intentions as public argument was proof of his esteem of her, ha. Or maybe just proof that most of the events were happening under her direction. Luckily, Jill was too busy rushing across campus to give their drama any more attention than that.

She hoped one of her new suitors would prove suitable, and turned her fantasies towards new avenues. Including the family's preferred candidate - What did he mean when he said her parents "had to deal with her too?"

*
The presents the taller every week rider brought to her teacher each class really touched Jill. She felt so lucky!
*
Jill didn't tell the boss that her horse had been drugged at the boarder barn where she'd placed it temporarily. She only mentioned that the trainer there was terrified of the grey horse at the time but still refused to let Jill try riding it instead of her. And it felt good to get at least that much off her chest.

The boss told her on the ride back about the paint's difficult childhood and Jill was actually glad she hadn't known all that going out. But she felt extra attached to the mare after that!

She was surprised and admittedly over the moon to hear the boss say "I thought you rode her well." It had not been easy, but Jill had felt largely invisible...

2010-03-03

Patience

If she couldn't be in the love affair she longed for, then Jill wanted at least some modern, current romantic relationships to admire. The handsome she'd investigated seemed, unfortunately, to be engaged. So it annoyed her that he'd said "I've put an offer in on a farm" instead of "we" -- as if that meant he was denying his relationship status somehow. Sour grapes? No doubt.
*
The flirt-painter had asked her to be his first topless model. ha. It was cute to see her bareback calendar idea stolen and underway with someone less modest than she. Since he wasn't replying to her emails anymore, she assumed it was romantic for them. She tried to think, good for them! The truth was she was far too private to post such nonsense on facebook or a blog, and was annoyed when her ex posted photographs of her in a bikini in the snow, right around the same time.
*
It was with great disappointment that Jill called the potential riding buddy at the Equestrian Team members farm to say she couldn't make it anymore, at least until she found paid work. It took up half a day just to ride one horse! Not to mention the prohibitive travel expense. She did not mention the condescending discouragement she felt somehow from the paid staff in the boss's absence, but it was a part of the picture too. She felt she had other pony options much closer to home and with much more freedom and potential for new friendships, but she still hated giving up the Wednesday/Weekend hacks that had made such a wonderful winter!
*
"Oh trust me, I know what you mean when you mention needing patience, and what you mean when you say hard to catch!" Jill said.

"I remember trying for ages in the big field to catch Stoney, when I was first getting to know him, while he ran around me as if being lunged, or ran repeatedly away or even just walked out of reach. Over and over and over for ages and ages and ages. I even remember losing it once and whipping handfuls of oats at him til they were all gone and then throwing the bucket at him in frustration as well, just before driving off in a huge huff, because he'd wasted our riding time. And, I consider myself one of the most patient horse people I know!"

But, after Stoney came to love cross country, he became easy to catch. Jill could still remember the first day she noticed. As she drove in, he was in the front paddock. She rolled down the window to say "well hello handsome" and he put his head up cheerfully and instantly started walking to the gate. She was overjoyed. Isn't that ... well, er, ...handsome!?!!
*
The competitors and barn staff yesterday got trading stories yesterday and Jill did not pipe up and add that the shared horse they had all experienced was one of the most agreeable, and safe partners she had ever had the pleasure of trying out. She had never ridden a horse like him that LOVED to jump! She must have rode him at least 10 times, and he was always a good boy. It was very sad for her riding career that he left, and she was sorely disappointed that she never did get to put him on autopilot and get packed around a Training course.

This was about the same time that her co-worker had mentioned to the clients that Jill was an unsafe teacher, while the boss was laid up in hospital. Why wouldn't the co-worker just offer her some safety coaching feedback? It left her in a very awkward position, and she decided to resign in the hopes of supporting everyone's best interest. It was unfortunate for the poor boss's bottom line that her unpaid hours would have to go to the co-worker that got paid in cash, but she was trying to do the right thing.

Jill vowed to learn how to make friends and supporters, rather than undermining enemies as she moved forward towards new opportunities. She truly wished to work as a team, she believed in synergy. She wanted to be a generous spirit, and made conscious efforts to take "the high road" as her older brother had always suggested.

2010-03-01

Farm Gossip

"I'm sorry, but that horse is SEXY" said a shakey legged lady, after dismounting in the centre of the ring and watching the flashy youngsters go by.

The teenage equestrian trotting past retorted "I know. If he was a man, I'd do him"

The lady, sighing, sat down on the mounting block, "Me Too."

Meanwhile, the teenager's dad piped up "ug. do i have to listen to this?"
*
The guy said "All these beautiful women" and gestured around the horse show. "And, me." He was teasing his son on the phone about how the best place to pic up chicks was a horse show.

A photographer nearby piped up, another rare date prospect on site. "Fit women, in tight pants" tell him, ha.

*
"Mike is dead," his 12 year old brothertold his neighbour and friend. "I don't want to play right now. I need to be alone."

Jill had had a dream before it happened. She'd also read about her dad reading her journal.

The guy she was on a date with that evening said "think how it makes me feel to see you cry." She couldn't help but think it might be nice to try a little vice versa.

Meanwhile a guy who was not her room mate's boyfriend left a note and token in their screen door.

*