Anti-Training Methods

Jill felt pleased about her progress. After being so marginalized in society and at home as she grew up, instead of supported in the truth of her nature, she was finally, getting pretty far in life. In the life she wanted for herself anyway.

Many of the harsh accusations a former associate surprised her with, were clearly false, as she always payed her bills and she strove to honour her word. You could tell from her credit rating and reputation.

Perhaps the venom came from a fear that Jill had landed a new job by telling some awful truth about the "Senior," former coach behind her back. But, Jill was a a believer that if you couldn't say anything nice about a person, then don't say anything at all, and she'd left that facilty completely off her resume and not mentioned it at all in the interview.

Jill used her art to express and vent instead of trying to ruin anyone's credibility. Hadn't her work shown that time and time again? Perhaps it was immature and narcissistic to navel gaze in her songwriting and poetry as she did, but did it really hurt anyone? Was it also somehow misleading? Jill was trying to consider the feedback and learn what she could.

She was willing to acknowledge mistakes.

Jill remorsefully remembered her first Dressage clinic where she followed the clinician's instruction and whipped her horse repeatedly. It made her sick to think of it now. There was also the disaster of the barefoot natural trim, which she'd arranged for the very same love of her life and it still made her feel naseaous with guilt and regret and sorrow over the pain she'd caused him with that too.

It was also that true she went from work place to work place to work place. And she was willing to examine that pattern in detail. She couldn't remember if she'd quit or been fired after the episode that first came to mind.

As clear as the day it happened, Jill could hear the boss's partner shouting in the arena, as they were schooling the sales horse. "Hit him again" whack. "And again!" Whack. "Again. HARDER!" whack smack. It made her feel weak to wonder exactly what they were doing in there, but she still went to the arena window to sneak a peek.

The young bay Holstiner was rearing and bucking in response to whatever lesson they were teaching him. Beating him in front of or beside a vertical. He was spinning around. Was the whipping because he was refusing to jump or was there some other exercise? She couldn't tell. She turned away and busied herself with some chore at the far end of the barn, where she would not have to hear it so clearly, nevermind watch.

When the boss came in and Jill set about her duty of untacking, feeling so sorry for the pony and giving him kindness in her esp and being as physically gentle and considerate with the heaving, sweaty exhausted animal as she could. As he opened his mouth to release the bit, she noticed a tooth sticking out the side of his mouth. It took her a second to actually recognize what it was. A tooth! Jutting out sideways from the dental vacancy!

Was this why he was so disagreeable or a result? "Did you see this?" Jill nodded towards it, as she slid the halter into place and snapped it on.

The boss was shocked "ohmigosh! Did you do that taking the bridle off?"

Jill glared at her. The boss took a deep breath and went on "Could you have caught him in the mouth putting the halter on?"

Jill had been trying to stick it out to the end of the agreed term for a good reference from the place, but she knew that she wouldn't/couldn't work there much longer.

Full Disclosure

"I need to know where exactly your riding him." uhoh. Jill was in trouble. She had taken the horse on every square inch of the property, except over the cross country jumps as other hoofprints in the snow had done.

He kept pulling shoes! Really twistedly mutated shoes! yikes. Jill had to admit she was used to riding horses with barefeet. Hadn't they mentioned snowpads - did they help? Surely the snow would all be gone soon and she could get properly conditioning on the property with the owner's blessing and permission!
*
While gaining respect for his work as an artist, she was losing respect for him as a person. Full disclosure means telling your friend you're thinking of travelling or taking a new job, before you actually do... as opportunity allows of course. That kind of thing. What he had done was avoided mentioning his plans even after he had made them, and while they were together discussing nearly related events! He also said he was spending the weekend on renovations when in fact it was his art he devoted effort to. She didn't mind that, but she wanted friends who actively told the truth - to themselves and others.

Furthermore, Jill thought that it was ridiculous to use the argument that the person pictured doesn’t find their own actions offensive as proof that the action/image isn’t offensive. Yikes. But, the way he used his model’s intentions as public argument was proof of his esteem of her, ha. Or maybe just proof that most of the events were happening under her direction. Luckily, Jill was too busy rushing across campus to give their drama any more attention than that.

She hoped one of her new suitors would prove suitable, and turned her fantasies towards new avenues. Including the family's preferred candidate - What did he mean when he said her parents "had to deal with her too?"

*
The presents the taller every week rider brought to her teacher each class really touched Jill. She felt so lucky!
*
Jill didn't tell the boss that her horse had been drugged at the boarder barn where she'd placed it temporarily. She only mentioned that the trainer there was terrified of the grey horse at the time but still refused to let Jill try riding it instead of her. And it felt good to get at least that much off her chest.

The boss told her on the ride back about the paint's difficult childhood and Jill was actually glad she hadn't known all that going out. But she felt extra attached to the mare after that!

She was surprised and admittedly over the moon to hear the boss say "I thought you rode her well." It had not been easy, but Jill had felt largely invisible...

Out of the Frying Pan?

Jill had left one job unexpectedly and had taken another one quickly. She was being treated almost as poorly as the horses... at the end of one day, Jill sat down and listed the things she'd been yelled at for:

Show/sales horse’s legs are more swollen than the other staff member described.

Doorway was only partly shoveled and left open

Old guys blankets should be adjusted more, better etc.

Sweep dirt floor of feed room at old barn

Grey horse never needs his hood

Sales horse needs polos behind (not communicated til after turnout without)

Tie hayloft door tighter next time

With this many horses can’t spare staff for Expo

Leg straps done up wrong (did you put this on?)

“we turn out in worse than this”

Put this horse out before that (dressed already) one since we may not continue turning out

“stop flicking the whip” vs. “really go after him”

Calling your path vs don’t get caught in the corner

“he’s kicked me once” “he’s never kicked anyone”

“you can tell you’re nervous and that’s why he’s doing that”

If the boss saw the blanket in that position earlier, shouldn’t the boss have adjusted it?

The mud was almost as treacherous as the ice. She was had to walk in the (knee deep) snow instead.

She never had time to mention that she'd found the sales horse choking on a huge length of twine from the round bale in the paddock.

Coolin' Out

Jill could hear the boss's partner shouting in the arena, as they were schooling the sales horse. The most prized, spoiled, well treated horse on the property. Their future.

"Hit him again!" Whack. "And again!" Whack. "Again. HARDER!" Whack, Smack. Thump, Groan. Swish.

The sound effects made her feel naseaous, but Jill still went to the arena window to look in. She was here to learn more about different training methods, and various styles, across different disciplines. The young bay Holstiner was rearing and bucking in response to whatever lesson they were teaching him. She couldn't watch it. If she was confused, he must be too. It was unfair. She turned away and busied herself with some chore at the far end of the barn.

When the boss came in and Jill set about her groom-duty of untacking, she noticed a tooth sticking out the side of his mouth. Sick! It was one that was clearly too long and should have been floated long ago, and had thus broken in the episode in the arena. It barely even looked like a horse tooth and she wanted to take a picture to prove later the horror before her.

Was this why he was so disagreeable or a result? She showed the boss, in the hopes of learning what action to take. The boss said "ohmigosh! Did you do that taking the bridle off? Could you have caught him in the mouth putting the halter on?" She said she would call the vet, but it was three days the horse wouldn't/couldn't eat before he did actually get medical attention.

Jill wanted a good reference from the place, but she knew that she wouldn't/couldn't work there much longer. Later, when a horse with a tooth injury fell into her hands after having been boarded there, she couldn't help but have her haunting theories...

*

People will tell you that's its actually hard to make a spur mark in the side of the horse, no matter how sharp the device that you are strapping on and using is. Jill could only respond that some people make it look easy. She would always remember from her time at that place, how the trainer had a spur change to make between every mount. At the time she was reading a book about harmony with horses that mentioned the possibility of such marks at the potential of razor blades in the hands of the monkey.

She felt sorry for all her equine (and fellow worker/rider) friends still stuck there.

Stubborn Courage

The last couple times Jill'd been riding, she'd thought what a lovely pony he was. It was boring to only have the grass ring to go round and round and she was tempted to try some other course soon...

It was nice to be challenged about riding the line in a certain number of strides. He really listened when she asked him to come back - twas lovely to know he was so responsive and adaptable. whoo hoo!

She was still sick however. The pain in her side was not abating, in fact it was going on a week this time. Recurring, long lasting and at least moderate pain... isn't that the kind of thing one sought medical attention for? The doctor's didn't have any suggestions for her however. Guess work in white coats, that what a friend of hers always said and that's what it felt like at the moment.

Jill said the rash he had from all the rain was clearing up nicely and was asked "Why does he have a rash?" She thought the rain explanation was pretty clear, and was taking her time coming up with an answer to the boss -- it reminded her of when a kid asked her at the Equine Research Teaching booth WHY a horse has bars in their mouth. Evolution she'd said, but the child insisted again, "But WHY?"
*
Remember when she sat the little tiny blond on the huuuuuge haystack and said “stay” and left the child there in the sun on the prickly straw for hours?
*
The woman needed a shot of whiskey before mounting her horse. Jill did not normally approve of such behaviour, but in this scenario, it made sense to her. The horse owner needed just to r e l a x a little bit, to make it all better.

It was not as easy to accept for Jill that the coach suggesting this unusual and no doubt uninsurable technique needed a shot too, but she withheld comment. She also kept her mouth shut when the horse owner mentioned that the booze bottle in the tack locker had a fullness level shrinking faster than her sips warranted. Far be it for her to be outspoken in regards to her boss's conduct.